Wednesday, August 30, 2006

The Name of the Rose

Now back to our regularly scheduled butt and poo programming...

Not too long ago
The Mayor learned that everyone has a little hole in their butt for making poo poo, himself being no exception.

Since that time he's become a little obsessed with his own little hole and all that the hole... um, accomplishes. Lately, when he gets a diaper change he wants to incessantly talk about his "accomplishments" and often begs to see them. (Eeew.) I think this is normal behavior for his age. (At least that is what I'm telling myself!)

Last night I was putting his diaper and pajamas on and noticed that he had a bit of a raging flanus.

Me: I'm going to put a little cream on your butt.

The Mayor: Why?

Me: Well, it looks a little sore and I think the cream will make it feel better.

The Mayor: Where is it sore?

Me: On your butt.

The Mayor: Where on my butt?

Me: Um, right here near your anus.

The Mayor: Huh?

Me: Here near your anus. The little hole in your butt is called an anus.

The Mayor: No. Mine is not called Anus.

Me: Sure it is. The little hole in everyone's butt is called Anus. My little hole is named Anus, Daddy's little hole is named Anus and your little hole is named Anus.

The Mayor: My little hole is NOT named Anus!

Me: (Indulging him) Okay then, what is your little hole named?

The Mayor: Dana.

Welcome to the House of Joy, Dana.

35 comments:

Lisa said...

Already a creative mind at work, and one that thinks long and hard about butts. I know where he got that from. Hee hee. Very cute story.

Lisa

Sayre said...

Dana??? I would love to know where that came from!

slackermommy said...

OMG! That's hysterical, I almost peed my pants. Good for you for using anatomical correct words. Some moms have a hard time with that. I'll never forget how apalled my mother was the first time she heard my kids say vagina and penis.

Melissa said...

Seriously, Dana? Hilarious. I hope there is a reason for Dana and not something just out of the blue. And if there is a reason, poor real Dana!

Diana said...

Have you asked him why Dana?

Christina_the_wench said...

Well who could blame him? Who wants to have an anus like everyone else's I ask you. Smart boy. *giggles*

Plain Jane Mom said...

Can you hear me laughing? That is fantastic. Go Owen!

Blonde Vigilante said...

As long as his anus doesn't become his imaginary friend...I think everything will be just fine. But, why do I get the feeling that you are going to be getting a call from pre-school abou this?

tpon said...

I just got off the phone with Dell Tech Support... I am going to have to send you the bill for my new keyboard. As a result of this post, it is now filled with snarfed milk.

Thank you.

Moobs said...

Now I kind of feel I have to come up with name for mine. I've been neglecting it.

wendy boucher said...

Guys always name their body parts, don't they? I like that he picked a name that could be either gender.

C said...

how funny. He has named it Dana. Well Dana sure puts out a lot of poop.

Megan said...

hahaha!!
I just found you on babes in blogland. I've been looking for another blogger with kids close together as inspiration as my second will be 13 months younger than my first. Anyways, I'll be checking in every so often if that's ok!

Mama C said...

Why is there a banner at the top of your blog that says "Queer Friendly" and "Embrace Diversity"? Just curious.

Cute story. I thought boys only named their penis. My sons have not name their anuses yet. I'm jealous. (My husband is correcting my grammar right now. Geez!)

Izzy said...

Dana the anus? lolololol...that's definitely one for the old scrapbook :)

Natsthename said...

At least it doesn't have a last name, too! DOES IT??

blessedmomx3 said...

HAAAA HAAA! That is SOOOO funny!
I don't know if it's funnier that you had the "everyone's is called anus" talk with him or that he was funny enough to pop out a name like that. But we call it bum weasel, so you're doing better than us.

Heather said...

O god that is funny! I love your kids already!


DANA! I think henceforth mine shall be... Hubert.

lildb said...

the little bit of me that wants to be grossed out is drowned by the major portion that thinks this is effing HILARIOUS.

(also, I saw your comment at Lily's, and I'm with you -- when/where/what/HOW with the minivan envy? and yet, there it is.)

Lisa said...

I laughed out loud (and woke my child up) because of that story. It was funny!

YOu made my day for the comment you made on my blog.

sweatpantsmom said...

I'd like to be first in line for the "My Hole Is Not Named Anus" T-shirts.

misha said...

Too funny! But why does it have to be a girl name? ;) I love the name of your blog. Love it.

Laundry Woman said...

You are such an accomodating hostess. Is he going to name his poo, also?

Pendullum said...

Ahhhh....
I smiling... another moment for Owen's memory book... Can just imagine this story being relayed to the first girlfriend!!!!

Deb said...

Your little one has some of the funniest things to say!

Blog Antagonist said...

LOL. That gave me a good chuckle. "Dana"...too funny. I miss the innocent questions. Now I have to explain stuff like "homosexuality" and "oral sex". Yippee.

Haewon said...

hey, i just realized ruby and ed have the same birthday, just 42 years apart. cool.

Grim Reality Girl said...

Dana? Hilarious! More creative than Bob. Very bright child you have there!

Kevin Charnas said...

AAAHHHH!!! LMFAO!!! DANA??? Oh man...whew...that is f-ing awesome...that just made my damn day!!!

Dana....

Dana...

ahahahahahahaAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!

Janet a.k.a. "Wonder Mom" said...

Dana....
My new favorite word for butthole!

(Girl in her Underwear sent me)

Dirty Blonde said...

I've heard of men naming their package but this is the first I've heard of naming ones chocolate starfish.

Dana....LOL

MustangChick74 said...

I was reading this aloud to my hubby, who got a big kick out of the whole thing.

He seems to think you have a future hot-rodder on your hands... He sells parts for semi trucks and one of his dealers is named Dana and they sell rear-ends for trucks!

gingajoy said...

Yesterday my son declared that his Anus was a head for his penis

furiousBall said...

Umm, ok that was the most appropro pick me up funny story ever. You rule.

CarpeDM said...

Found you at Joe's. Now I am going to go cry because I am apparently an anus. Thanks, kid.

Although it is an adorable story.