Friday, November 03, 2006

Not What You Expect To Hear

I was folding the never ending laundry and listening to my children chatter to one another in the tub.

K was supervising.


They were filling bath toys and then squeezing the water out, covering each other in jet sprays.

It was all completely innocent.

Then I heard The Mayor yell,

Tease Me! Squeeze Me! Get Me Wet!
I'm expecting a case worker from The Department of Family and Children's Services to knock on my door at any moment.

27 comments:

lynsalyns said...

Oh, this is funny! FUNNY! I laughed so hard coffee came out of my nose.

Iris/Rissy said...

I only want to know which one, you or K, were heard saying that?????

Christina_the_wench said...

Just tidy up a bit, then. Those bitches can get nasty.

wendy boucher said...

Eavesdropping can be so rewarding.

Momish said...

Your son is a complete riot with what comes out of his mouth!!! What a character! You must be in hysterics all day long. Too funny.

Mamma said...

You have GOT to turn down the volume on that porn.

Island Spice said...

oh my!

Sayre said...

Goodness - the Mayor really is preparing for a life of political public service, isn't he?

Blonde Vigilante said...

I wish bathtime at my house was that exciting. I need to set up a play date with one of my "friends".

urban-urchin said...

at least it wasn't whip me, beat me, call me edna. or something like that.

sweatpantsmom said...

Too funny. And now I just read urban-urchin's comment and I'm howling.

I wouldn't expect a visit from Family Services, but possibly one from your eager, swinging neighbors.

Starrlight said...

Now that was funny! You are gonna have your hands full with that one.

Stephanie said...

LOL! I needed that today.

Megan said...

Oh Lord, not sure how to respond to that! Sounds like there's a lot more action over there than here!

Amy Linder said...

Too, too funny! :)

Girl In Her Underwear said...

I'm laughing so hard picturing the Mayor with his first serious date. I wish I could see the look on her face when he starts patting her and asking her to squeeze and tickle him. Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! You know what? That's probably not something a mom wants to hear, huh?

Emma Kaufmann said...

Very funny. Yeah, my four year old said "Mommy I want to drink your titties," the other day while I was in a check out queue which was a bit embarassing because she hasn't nursed since she was 1. I hope a call to the Department of Children's services wasn't made in that instance...

Lisa said...

YOu need to start a Top 10 list of things you never thought you'd hear your kiddos say... Those sentences would SO top the list!

That is really funny!

Lisa Goldstein/Kelly Kelly said...

I agree with Lisa. Definitely keep a list and show it to his future spouse/significant other, or read it at the wedding toast or something...

Lisa G

carmachu said...

Thats great! I love hearing things kids say and taking it out of context....its like when sarah said today "I have too many balls..."

Loudlush said...

That is hysterical!! See my comment in previous post about your son's future girlfriends :)

Mommy off the Record said...

Yikes. Um, well, hmmmm, what to say about this one...

*dials CPS*

j/k :)

slackermommy said...

Too funny! I love all your kiddy porn stories!

Trish said...

That reminds me of when my son was younger, and we were in the grocery store where they had those small baskets for children to push along beside you. The store was not very crowded, so I raced my son down the aisle with the basket and when we got to the front, he yelled out, "Mommy, please don't beat me, don't beat me!"

The store suddenly became VERY crowded to me.

Sayre said...

I read my husband the "Blow Me, Daddy!" and "Tease me, Squeeze me, Get me Wet" stories and he was doubled over and turning purple he was laughing so hard. Then he asked why I don't say things like that... Thanks for making his day!

Heather said...

Out of the mouth of babes! That is helarious! I can't begin to tell you the things my children have said! At least you were not in public! My children usually save the true jewels for when random strangers can hear them!

Penny said...

Funniest thing I've read all week!!!

LOL!!!