Thursday, February 15, 2007

Chillin' with Dana

This morning The Mayor asked K to get him one of the blue cold packs from the freezer.

"What do you need it for, Mayor?" K asked.

"I want to rub it on Mommy's boobies."

[Ho no you ain't neither!]

"I don't think Mommy would like that Mayor."

"Okay, then can we put it on my butt?"

...and the next thing you know The Mayor was strapped into an ace bandage holding an ice pack on his rear.

Dana likes to chill.

42 comments:

Jeff said...

is it wrong that Johnny Cash popped into my head when I wrote that?

burn, burn, burn... that ring of fire...

you're in the south, right?

Blog Antagonist said...

Ohhhhhh that Dana. You should write a book. You can call it "The misadventures of Dana." It would a hands down bestseller!

Her Bad Mother said...

And make that a board book. If there can be a board book about a farting dog, there can be a board book about a precocious anus.

Janet a.k.a. "Wonder Mom" said...

Dana aka leather starfish needed some Valentine's affection...don't judge.

I would totally buy a board book about any type of anus!!!

Sayre said...

My son used to eat board books. Thank goodness none of them were about Dana - or farting dogs. Mostly they were about elephants.

Mrs. Schmitty said...

Hilarious! Sounds like my house!

Mamma said...

How sweet he thought of you first!!!

wordgirl said...

What an unpredictable scamp that Dana is! You just never know what he's thinking until he offers to rub ice on your boobs and then decides to apply it to his...nether regions. Ah... the healing power of ice.

Patience said...

So he wants the ice pack for your boobies. Or his backside. What goes on in the mind of a child?!?

Little amazing enchanting gifts from God!

Karly said...

Dana? DANA? Where does he come up with these things? And why in the world did he want to put ice on your boobies?

Oh, and in the spirit of ice packs on butts, your word verification for this comment is: cbutz. LOL.

kfk said...

What a comedian. I agree, anus is just so repulsive. Dana is very discreet.

The Sour Kraut said...

That is hilarious. It's so funny what kids come up with. Most of it will mortify them come their adolescent years.

Much More Than A Mom/The Opinionated Parent said...

As soon as I saw the title pop up in my RSS reader I laughed. Just what I needed. Thanks!

Gina said...

That is so funny! what a great name... so mild and easy on the ears of those who might overhear your child talking about "it".

Gingers Mom said...

That is too funny. Why is it kids are obsessed with mommy's boobies? My whole family wants to get a hold of them. At least you were able to distract him with Dana.

Amber said...

Here, here on the board book. I did, after all, buy the book "Everyone Poops," a literary classic.

Kevin Charnas said...

I think that there's an adventure story in there somewhere...

"Dana and the ice cavern."

Just wait until the submarine that is lurking down there comes plowing up through that iceberg. 'Cause you KNOW it's only a matter of time.

Penny said...

LOL!!! WTF?? lol!!!

I love your stories.

Freezer Boobies.. Chillin' Ladies...

love it.

Long Island Dad said...

"A rose by any other name would smell as sweet..."

wayabetty said...

Um, and why would he want to rub it all over your boobies?!

mamatulip said...

I used to have a cat named Anus.

gingajoy said...

i'm cracking up at this post *and* mama tulips comment.

i want to know where he got the idea of putting an icepack on your boobs. to reduce swelling?

Paige said...

Half awake, I almost didn't take the time to click on the link.

I'm glad I did.

Otherwise I would have been wondering who the hell Dana is and why she's mentioned in this post.

Cece said...

I love that kid! He cracks me up.

Iris said...

Dana, the Percoscious Anus...... I can see it now on Treehouse TV

He is one amazingly funny little kid.....of course, we all know where he gets it from

urban-urchin said...

my kids do/say some funny stuff, but the mayor really takes the cake/icepack.

I love HBM's idea about a book about a precocious anus.

urban-urchin said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Christina_the_wench said...

God help the future females in his life. Frozen boobies... lol

BethGo said...

What the heck is that all about?
And I thought my kids were weird.
;)

Mel said...

Oh. My. He is too funny.
You know, i think he is on to something. I hate the word anus. From not on, I'm calling mine Barb.

mark said...

They Mayor is very funny. Maybe he's trying to empathize with everyone who has been living in frigid weather, and I appreciate that.

nutty mummy said...

the question 'why?' pops into my head but then hey, who am I to argue against what just feels good!!

Bless him!

carmachu said...

Is there something you areent telling the rest of us? Did he walk in on your and yoru husband in one of your crazier moods in bed or something?

carmachu said...

Is there something you areent telling the rest of us? Did he walk in on your and yoru husband in one of your crazier moods in bed or something?

Stepping Over the Junk said...

I love kids. Kids kids kids and what they think and talk about and admit. I read the dana post next, and can't stop laughing!

Slackermommy said...

Okay, so is he hoping that rubbing ice packs on you will make your boobie pillows grow back?

Kristi said...

Oh no he di-int. At least he was rubbing his rear and not the front. Then you'd have some real problems...

lildb said...

fabulous.

goddamn fabulous.

Karana said...

I too am left wondering as to WHY he would want to do that in the first place. Gosh, just thinking about it is making me cringe.

At least Dana got what he wanted. Or something.

Shannon said...

So is he gearing up for the annual summer ice sitting contest? (We acutally had these in my hometown, thriving metropolis that it was.)

ewe are here said...

I wonder where children get these ideas!

My little one loves ice, too. God forbid you have some in your drink because he will stand in front of you and demand you give it up to him. immediately!

Abbynormal said...

very very very very hilarious. it's also a good thing you posted a link to the dana story.