Saturday, December 29, 2007

Good Housekeeping

The current score is definitely in the children's favor.

They are kicking proverbial parent butt during this two week period without childcare.

[Eight down -- seven to go. But who's counting? Ahem.]

Yesterday, when they were mercifully asleep, K and I collapsed on the guest bed.

"You have something stuck to your shirt," he said. "It might be a booger."

I looked at my sleeve. It was a piece of rice.

I pried it free from my shirt and flung it in the general direction of the trash can.

"It made it to the garbage can," I said. "I know it did."

"Yeah," K laughed "because you ARE Wilt Chamberlin."


The house will be clean again when they go back to school, right?


51 comments:

Omaha Mama said...

Oh Lord - I hear ya! The other night my Hubs mentioned that the children might just be killing us, and I agreed. Must go - Lightning has rolled under the stove again.

furiousBall said...

you are shorter than i imagined you mr chamerberlin and whiter and more feminine

mauniejames said...

I don't know..mine is disgusting and we are three adults...two of us with horrible colds and one annoyingly healthy but another man who does nothing and if he does it has to be done over...I said I never thought my house could look like this..lazy son said..I'll get to it..by the way it's not that bad..I have seen worse..that scares me....Maun

hello insomnia said...

The booger/rice mystery is a regular occurrence in this household.

Fairly Odd Mother said...

I hope you are only like Wilt in your 'aim' and not, ahem, in your 'pursuits'. (if you'll recall his claim of 20k lady luvers). Unless, of course, that was just K sweet-talking you.

And, rice is an evil in this house. No other food (other than couscous) can cause such a mess.

JO-N said...

Same fate here. Holidays is when the parents have more to do. Well, it will be over soon.

JO-N
cre8buzz member

Lisa Milton said...

Ug! I am watching Zack prepare his own fancy breakfast: rice krispies.

It is great that he can do it all himself these days, but my floor will never be the same.

Be well, J. Clean houses are overrated.

Holly said...

Um, right, sure, the house will be clean again...

BlondeMomBlog (Jamie) said...

I went into work Thursday for three glorious quiet hours. It was nice. And clean. My 5-year-old doesn't go back to school until January 8!

And at least you made the effort to throw the rice away. We have two dogs and sometimes I just let them lick up the crumbs. ;)

Shannon said...

LMAO. Rice on the floor...no big deal.

My house is always cleaner in the summer when I kick them outside or take them to the park.

When Jeff and I were first looking at houses up here in NH, we noticed how dirty and dingy the interiors were. We figured out that it's so cold for so long here that most of the time is spent indoors.

Kids are dirty little animals ;)

Avery Gray said...

I only have one, and he's sucking the life out of me. But I only have three more days of hell to endure before he goes back to school. And the hubby goes back to work then, too. Yay for all of us!!

QT said...

Oh lord - just catching up on your blogging antics - here is for a fast 7 days~ Happy New Year, Jess!

All Adither said...

When in doubt, assume it's a booger.

Angie
www.AllAdither.com

Redneck Mommy said...

I'm trying to look at it as a free pass to reenact my slovenly teen years. That way I can join in the fun instead of just nag at them to pick up after themselves.

It's going to take me all of January to clean up after these monkeys...I'm including my darling husband in this too...Charming man has forgotten how to pick up his laundry and put his dishes in the sink.

Sigh.

Damselfly said...

First horizontal parenting...now horizontal housekeeping. I love it!

Your house can't possibly be dirtier than mine....

Sarah said...

I hate to break it to you, but the house will only be cleaner when they go back to school if someone actually cleans it. I'm just sayin'. Now I am on your side here. I have a big New Year's Party on Monday and I'm frantically trying to clean. Each room I get clean the kids come behind and trash. I'm about ready to give up.

Anonymous said...

I hear ya. I have only one child (and dog) and the only word to describe our house is TRASHED.

WAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH.

Wendy said...

The above comment was me---said child started feeding ME ("here comes the airplane, Mom") her hot cereal just as I was signing off....

jen said...

we've been on the same two week countdown. thankfully, we are down to four more days.

hence, instead of "four more years!" chanted in great angst, i am chanting "four more days" in enthusiasm.

Family Adventure said...

Hang in there!! I'm counting, too.

Heidi

mimikatemom said...

Cliche alert....

A house isn't a home until you can write "I Love You" in the dust.


That's my story and I'm stick'n to it :)

e

Paige said...

My house looks so bad right now, I might just buy a new one.

Screw cleaning, dude.

Janet said...

will it?

Pattie said...

I am feeling you, sista.

These kids cannot go back to school soon enough.

My house is in shambles...

Happy New Year!!!!

P.S. Did Santa bring you a park ranger this year? *snicker*

Kelley said...

In Oz they don't go back till the 29th of January. I hope no one gets stapled to the wall in that time..... cause they can't make much of a mess while hanging there.

Aliki2006 said...

Not only will MY house also be cleaner when the kids go back next week, but I think I will suddenly become more patient as well...

Scarlett Wanna Be said...

I have a big weekend of house cleaning planned...when we finish vacuuming, I plan on making carpet angles.

"Weee, weee, the carpet doesn't smell like dog poop, wee, wee!!!!"

I am so psyched!

ImpostorMom said...

Oh lord I'm starting to think mine will never be clean again. After the birthday party today I told my husband we might as well give up and turn our den into a play room now that it has a wee swing set in it. I have never seen so many toys!

Mrs. Schmitty said...

At least it wasn't a booger...I remember the one you had hanging from your face after tucking Rooster in!

Jenifer said...

Oh J, you know they will win right?!
How many more sleeps...

Glad the holidays are happy ones.

Sarcastic Mom said...

But, Jess, please PLEASE tell me that when you have 2, they at LEAST play with each other so that you don't have to play on the floor ALL DAY LONG ANYMORE?

*cries*

lildb said...

what does it say about me that I would've probably tried to eat it?

is it that I'm hungry? or, more likely the case: too effing lazy to hurl the damn thing away.

Pgoodness said...

Oh my! I thought it was just us - my house has been a disaster since my kid has been out of school and my husband has been home from work! UGH.

Dorothy said...

Four of my seven grandchildren went to church and lunch with me today. Ages..4, 13, 18, and 21..plus my daughter and some siblings. The house in just minutes was filled with cell phones, ipods, cameras, shoes coats...etc...and we live alone my husband and I...and boy do we feel for you.....

My best Dorothy from grammology
remember to call gram (not too often)just kidding...
http://grammology.com

Kimmylyn said...

Your lucky it was rice.. 10 out of 10 times it is either a snot stream or spit up..

My house will not be clean until they are in college

I just cleaned my basement and within ten minutes it was shot to shit.

Queen of the Mayhem said...

Oh how I feel this pain! Each morning, when JM awakes...his first words are, "I don't want to go to school today!" Yeah....next week will be great fun...reacclamating him to preschool!

Good luck!

motherbumper said...

My inner clean-freak has had to leave the building. It's a survival tactic.

Natalie said...

Whew! It's a good thing it was rice. Dried boogers are much more difficult to remove.

Lotta said...

The kids are kicking our ass too. Merry Christmas!

Staci Schoff said...

I'm not sorry to say I don't feel your pain, because I have to leave the house to go to work. It's quite a bit messier when I get home than it is when they're at school all day, but at least I wasn't here. Happy New Year!

carrie said...

Yup.

I had to pry boogers off a real, honest-to-goodness wall yesterday.

School will not come soon enough.

Heaven help us all!

Circus Kelli said...

I don't know about your house, but I know my house will be clean again when they go back to school... of course, I'll be at work and not able to enjoy it... :)

JoeInVegas said...

I think it time for some more kids, so that you can have a smaller one (or two) to keep it going.

Ribbon Rock Star said...

A clean house? What's that??

LOL! Everytime I clean, I have a lil monster on my trail and these monsters must be MESSY monsters because they don't like CLEAN.

Linda

Ortizzle said...

Ya know, I don't have kids, but my husband and I could be classified as such in terms of making messes around the house. If a dried up grain of rice were the least of it, I could so celebrate. ;-)

Happy New Year 2008!

not-so suburban momma said...

it's not my kids that are driving me crazy it's my husband. I sent him out to take the garbage to the curb and it took him 1 HOUR (I am not fucking kidding). He started to "organize" the recycling and in his typical pack-rat frenzy removed all of the newspapers because there was AN article (singular) about soccer a week ago that he wants to read. I tried to explain to him about this new thing called the internet but his eyes were sort of glassy. On top of that I ended up going outside and taking the stuff to the curb myself. After the hour was up.
I've banned him from taking out the garbage. See how smooth he is??

Jennifer said...

Mine have been "helping me a lot this break by having taken to making their own breakfast, lunch and snacks. Ugh. Enough with the help, I say.

I have a present for you over at my place. Sorry to say it's not a surprise day of childcare and or cleaning. But it's pretty. So, Happy New Year anyway. ;)

painted maypole said...

is your house ever clean? because mine isn't. at least not all the rooms at the same time. and I only have one kid. but a big house.

NotSoSage said...

Oh, yes. I'm glad I'm not the only one. I wonder how it is that we manage to keep the place cleaner when we're working full time and only home after 6 pm.

Here's to a neat and tidy New Year!

kellypea said...

Just wait until they're in junior high...Just wait. It gets sooooooo much better.

Bwhahahahah! Happy New Year to you!

Amanda said...

Hang in there!

Happy new year.