Thursday, February 05, 2009

The Dangers of Free Association Parenting

Last night, after I finished reading to The Mayor, he asked me to tell him stories about when I was a kid.

Oddly, I sort of drew a blank. What to say...???

"Tell me about when you were seven," he said.
Seven... seven... what was I doing when I was seven?

[Perhaps I killed too many of my memory related brain cells during the college years?]

I told him that my friend Tomi Lynn and I would pretend we were super heroes who rode Big Wheels up and down Bullring Lane, a culdesac near our houses. ['Olé!]

After a hard day's work as Electra Woman and Dyna Girl, Tomi and I would play "restaurant" (as long as her mother wasn't around to put the kibosh on our menu items).

Typically, I played the customer and sat at the table while Tomi waited on me.

Tomi played the waitress, but looking back I realize I should say waitresses, as she seemed to suffer a multiple personality disorder in this game. One minute she'd be a waitress named Della and the next, a mean one named Kutchen.

[Tomi grew up to be an actress.]

Kutchen & Della routinely served the restaurant specialty, white bread smeared with a thick layer of butter and then coated in sugar.

[Ew.]

The other specialty was Pickles In A Bag.

Tomi would load dill pickle slices into a sandwich bag and tie a knot in it.

I would poke a hole in the corner of my bag and suck the pickle juice out.

[Where WAS her mother?!]

The Mayor was pretty intrigued about the pickle bag.

[Surely there must be more interesting stories to tell???]

This morning I wrote to my parents with an appeal...

Please, write down stories about my childhood and send them right away!

I wonder if it's already too late.

Perhaps from this day forward I will be known to The Mayor as that Sugary-Wonder Bread eatin', pickle-juice drinkin' Freak.

[Oh, hi!]

24 comments:

WILLIAM said...

Were youplaying a pregnant customer at the restaurant?

Apryl's Antics said...

I loved Electra Woman and Dyna Girl and Dr. Shrinker and Land of the Lost, etc. Before those were Sigmund the Seamonster, Big John Little John, Isis, and Shazam! Oh Saturday mornings, I miss you. The magic has been replaced by 24-hour kids programming. :(

We served "rock soup" at our restaurant: carrots in orange juice.

Also, a big wheel turned upside down made a great "ice cream maker".

Thanks for the trip back.

verygoodyear said...

haha, I love "Pickles in a Bag"! Kids are amazing.

Holly said...

I can't remember ANY of my childhood, which my husband teases me mercilessly about.

JoeinVegas said...

Hmm, better start watching the refrigerator for dry pickles.

furiousBall said...

whoa, DG's boots are kick ass

Sayre said...

I used to LOVE peanut butter bread with sugar on top!!! And I introduced my son to cinnamon toast (the way I made it with lots of butter and sugar and cinnamon). Actually, now that I think about it, much of my childhood menu had sugar on top. That might explain the diabetes now...

YES! Get your parents to write this stuff down before the Alzheimer's kicks in. We waited too late with my in-laws, but my dad's working on it.

koehmstedt said...

LOL that is all too hysterical. Impromptu parenting at its finest. Lo)

Patience said...

We all loooooved bread, butter, and sugar! What less healthy snack could possibly be consumed!!

And I never bothered with the baggie; I drank pickle juice out of the jar. Until I'd get caught by the all-seeing eye of my mother.

Backpacking Dad said...

Sugar sandwiches are fantastic. But my favourites were jam and butter sandiwches.

I used to sing a song while I made them: "Jam and butter!!...." (I don't remember the rest) and do a little dance.

Janet said...

Did you ever play Wonder Twin Powers Activate? That was a classic in my neighbourhood.

One summer night, when my parents had friends over, all the kids were outside playing hide and seek near dusk. We were hiding in fairly vanilla places when I heard the seeker shout out "1-2-3 on [my cousin] up on the neighbours roof!"

Wha?? Where were OUR parents?!!!

liliannattel said...

Too funny!

mamatulip said...

Your pickles in a bag made me think of how my cousin and I used to pocket packets of relish from burger joints...then, while driving home, we'd sit in the backseat and pretend to pick our noses. We'd really play it up, and when we got another driver (or passenger)'s attention, we'd stick our fingers in the relish packets and wipe our fingers all over the windows, so it looked like we were wiping our boogs all over the place.

That's what I was doing when I was seven.

Colleen - Mommy Always Wins said...

Lovely. ;-)

When I was seven I rode bikes and played freeze tag and kickball in the dead end street down the block.

Not Hannah said...

I believe at age seven I was spinning around in the front yard in my Wonder Woman underoos.

Some things never change.

Penny said...

I cannot wait to read stories about seven year old you! lol! I'll be back!

Celeste said...

I choose to NOT remember stuff.

Expatriate Chef said...

You just sealed it for me. I will be getting the kiddo the Batgirl costume for her birthday.

flutter said...

nut bar.

megachick said...

sugared bread was definitely a hit in our house. i used to eat butter straight up, too. it's a wonder i didn't grow up with a major weight problem.

Patois said...

Punky Pickle and her Pickle Posse. You need a posse.

Domestic Extraordinaire said...

Big wheels! I loved my pink & blue big wheel with the flat side of the tire after I wore it out so I thumped down the sidewalk. We also made ramps for our big wheels & I convinced my little brother to lay in between the ramps.

Gee...that may explain away a lot of who he ended up being. Whoops!

Mrs. Chicken said...

I LOVED Electra Woman and Dyna Girl! No one else ever remembers that show. Thanks for the memory this morning -- I needed it.

Guy from Valencia said...

Yes,right you are - they are so cool.Still like them a lot!