Wednesday, February 11, 2009

From My Office To Candyland

When I picked up the kids after work, the weather was nice and they were playing outside.

I sat down and let them play for another hour.

K was working late, so there was no hurry.

I took off my jacket and, in my short sleeved shirt, enjoyed the sun's warmth on my arms.

The Mayor and The Rooster ran around and around the school playground.

I love it when they burn off the jet fuel like that.

"They'll fall asleep easily," I thought to myself, smiling.

The thing is, these scenes end in drama most days. Somewhere in in here I have a timing problem.

The perfection of the afternoon sun and the playground unravels as soon as we get in the car.

Everything becomes vile and loathsome once they are buckled into car seats, especially me.

Everything I say and do for the next sixty minutes, beginning with the car ride home and ending with dinner, will be an extraordinary failing as far as my children are concerned.

I start off by refusing to mitigate the daily fight over the middle seat belt buckle that doubles as an imaginary popsicle.

Mommy is terribly, horribly MEAN and the world is really, grossly unfair!

Lately, K has been walking home from the train station in order to get a little extra exercise.

When he arrived home tonight, both children were wailing inconsolably.

The Mayor begged his newly arrived father for a band-aid which he urgently needed having inflicted a small, almost imperceptible scratch upon his person during a bathroom mishap that allegedly occurred when I sent him in to wash his hands for dinner.

The Rooster simply needed food.

K and I stuffed their little faces with grilled cheese sandwiches, grapes, cucumber slices, buttered rice, blueberries (in January, I know, I know – the jet fuel, I totally suck) and then…

It was all Candy Land, all the time.

[Though the little cheaters insisted that K remove the Gingerbread Man card from the game's deck because both of them stand in firm opposition to the possibility that an unfortunate draw might set them so far back on the board.]


mo.stoneskin said...

Let me guess. Oh the joys?

3carnations said...

We love Candyland!

I'm hosting a Build a Bear giveaway on my blog - Maybe you'd like to try to win for one of your little ones? :)

Kyla said...

I have to confess. I stack the deck so every few cards the next picture card is drawn so the games are over lickety split. I also remove the single cards. Heh.

Do you ever give then snack in the car? BubTar was coming home CRANKY for a while there, just miserable. Then I realized he was pretty hungry and once I started giving him a good sized snack in the afternoon, his mood vastly improved.

Magpie said...

I had TWO temper tantrums trying to get out of the house this morning. And then, when I dropped her at school, she kissed me and ran off, everything hunky-dory. The ups and downs are staggering.

Cristie said...

I am sad to say I have experienced your exact situation. I too have cherished a few moments peace watching my kids wear themselves out on the playground. I congratulated myself for giving them this wonderful opportunity for exercise. Truth was, I just wanted a few minutes of quiet transition between work and home.
But there's always a price for peace. Payment usually starts in the car, - in rush hour, at dinnertime. Yes, I transform into my personal version of Mommy Dearest. I agree with a previous comment - buy additional peace with healthy snacks in the car. The link under my name goes to a post I wrote about my picks for healthy car snacks for kids.

Above Average Joe said...

We play a Dora version of Candyland and have never thought of pulling the gingerbread card out.

Might be a good idea considering in my house it is equal to the death card in a tarot deck.

Patois said...

I consider playing Candyland a punishment for all my failings as a mother. (And, I, too, stack that deck to make it go, go, go!)

Anonymous said...

When I was a kid I envied my best friend's Candyland. My kids have it. Little did I know how often we would play it! I remember the bandaid days. It got to the point where I said, "no blood no bandaid." My kids went through a stage where they would be crabby and disagreeable and argumentative and hellish really when I picked them up from an after-school program. Finally I started bringing them a snack to eat on the way home. It totally changed things.

Kim said...

I totally get their wanting to remove the card....

I am with them on that one.

(formerly known as Karen Forest ;)

JoeinVegas said...

Ah, Candyland, so much more suggary than chutes and ladders. And don't even try to tell them about checkers, where somebody is guaranteed to lose.

Bogart in P Towne said...

Yup...time for me to procreate...good thing I get married in 2 weeks.

g-man said...

Yeah, we dads have that power.