Wednesday, March 04, 2009

One Dry Moon

Lately we've been spending a lot of time recreating at our local Y.M.C.A.

I especially enjoy it when The Rooster sits on a stool outside my shower stall after we're done, eating a snack and singing at the top of her lungs,

"It's fun to stay at the Y.M.C.A."
She always gets a laugh from the other naked wimmins in the locker room.

It's been too cold to burn off the children's jet fuel at the park so into the pool we go.

However, I am seriously about to complain to THE MANAGEMENT because the pool chemical balance has spun out of control.

They like, totally go to eleven.]

As evidence, a speedo swim suit usually lasts me through three months of workouts before it looses all it's elasticity and color.

[And then the girls, who were properly lifted and secure when the suit was tight and new, are forced to swing low in the faded, shapeless bag my speedo becomes... which is so... very pretty.]

My last two speedo suits, both purchased since the new year, were completely thrashed after two weeks in the water.

Two weeks!

ATTENTION GOOD PEOPLE OF THE YMCA: I can't be out there buying up speedo swim suits every other week!

[insert various expletives here]

Swim suit issues aside, the chemicals are also having a negative impact on our family's skin.

The Family Joy is one itchy lot.

[Oh, the shame of dryness!]

Despite copious vats of lotion application, we itch on.

Being the sweet, and wonderful man that he is, K routinely offers to re-apply lotion to the family's most bothersome body parts.
"Where do you need it?" he asks, waving the lotion bottle.
The Mayor and I turn our backs to him and lift our shirts.

Ack! That out of reach spot between our shoulder blades!

The Rooster, on the other hand, sports her most offending itch in regions located much further south.

"Where do you need lotion, Roo?"
Every time he asks, her eyes sparkle with mischief and she drops her pants to moon him.

17 comments:

WILLIAM said...

Your speedo becomes a speedon't.

Mary G said...

I worked at a pool for years and know very well that some staff is either inadequately trained to too lazy to do a proper pool balance. Sounds to me like a PH problem, not just chlorine; although the chlorine is, indeed, what is eating your bathing suit. However, in a properly maintained pool you should get at least three months out of it even if you are swimming daily.
You need to get tough with complaining about it; recreation complex manager is a good level.
That is a truly funny and lovable photo.

Domestic Extraordinaire said...

Hopefully the chemical issue gets resolved soon at the pool-if not I hope you have plenty of lotion for all those full moons that will be occurring until then.

Anonymous said...

apples do not fall far from the tree

furiousBall said...

i say everybody starts swimming naked to prevent further elastic abuse by the chemicals

Vodka Mom said...

I'm so proud that you actually have the balls to put a suit ON.

holy crap.

JoeinVegas said...

Yes, it looks like she is taking after her mom.

Kim said...

WOW! I can't believe how much she looks like you AND how much she has grown.

If I could just slow down this whole "passing of time" thing....

liliannattel said...

Is there a salt water pool around?

mamatulip said...

I love that look on her face! And her outfit!

She does look a LOT like you - wow!

MamaDrama said...

She is one sassy girl - love her!
We use Cetaphil cream (not lotion) for the driest skin in the house and it works wonders. Big tubs at Costco..

Lala's world said...

the older I get the more in love I am with underwire and whoever invented it! my girls desperately need it now!

Above Average Joe said...

C'mon, nobody likes an itchy butt!

Loralee Choate said...

Somehow I have difficulty imagining ANYTHING on you sagging.

(The mooning thing? Hee hee hee)

ms. changes pants while driving said...

swing looooowwwwwww, sweet chaaariot.....

Patois said...

The scary part is they must feel the need for increasing the chemicals because of disgusting, um, fluids and such floating about. That would have me back in the park.

CPD said...

Your bathing suit problems can be solved with one word: Polyester. After many years of swimming and teaching swimming 5+ days a week, I can tell you that a polyester suit will last nearly forever without fading or stretching out.

To lessen the itchy-skin factor we would moisturize before teaching (usually 3-4 hypothermic hours in an over-chlorinated pool).