Lately we've been spending a lot of time recreating at our local Y.M.C.A.
I especially enjoy it when The Rooster sits on a stool outside my shower stall after we're done, eating a snack and singing at the top of her lungs,
"It's fun to stay at the Y.M.C.A."She always gets a laugh from the other naked wimmins in the locker room.
It's been too cold to burn off the children's jet fuel at the park so into the pool we go.
However, I am seriously about to complain to THE MANAGEMENT because the pool chemical balance has spun out of control.
They like, totally go to eleven.]
As evidence, a speedo swim suit usually lasts me through three months of workouts before it looses all it's elasticity and color.
[And then the girls, who were properly lifted and secure when the suit was tight and new, are forced to swing low in the faded, shapeless bag my speedo becomes... which is so... very pretty.]
My last two speedo suits, both purchased since the new year, were completely thrashed after two weeks in the water.
ATTENTION GOOD PEOPLE OF THE YMCA: I can't be out there buying up speedo swim suits every other week!
[insert various expletives here]
Swim suit issues aside, the chemicals are also having a negative impact on our family's skin.
The Family Joy is one itchy lot.
[Oh, the shame of dryness!]
Despite copious vats of lotion application, we itch on.
Being the sweet, and wonderful man that he is, K routinely offers to re-apply lotion to the family's most bothersome body parts.
"Where do you need it?" he asks, waving the lotion bottle.The Mayor and I turn our backs to him and lift our shirts.
Ack! That out of reach spot between our shoulder blades!
The Rooster, on the other hand, sports her most offending itch in regions located much further south.
"Where do you need lotion, Roo?"Every time he asks, her eyes sparkle with mischief and she drops her pants to moon him.