Sunday, May 31, 2009

Cheers

My fellow Georgians,

Recently, an official in Georgia's water infrastructure department let a certain cat, as it were, out of the bag. Apparently, the "maverick" state of California is set to put in place a water conservation program known officially as something along the lines of "potable reuse." Needless to say, only a bureaucrat could come up with such a euphemism. Promoters of the concept have, however, taken a tip from Hollywood advertisers to come up with the vivid and unforgettable slogan, "Ass to Glass." Now it transpires that, with their typical cultural arrogance, Californians are getting ready to export their program--including their so-called "vivid" slogan--to every other state.

I'm sure you share my feeling that while we in the sovereign state of Georgia may see the value of a waste water reuse program in the face of drought, we will NEVER accept the cultural hegemony of another state no matter how big it is! Accordingly, we at GLOP--Georgian League for Organizing Poop--are launching a campaign to create a slogan of which Atlantans can be as proud as they were at the completion of the 17th St. bridge.

To encourage Georgians to submit their slogans for the campaign, we are going to get, as it were, the ball rolling with a few slogans of our own. We in no way claim to have exhausted the possibilities. Here are the sample candidates:

Poop to Soup
Fart to Tart
Smelly Sh*t to Banana Split
Bowel to Bowl
Sphincter to supper

And my personal favorite, with a certain je ne sais quois:

Crap to Crepe

Please spread the news of the campaign as widely as possible.

Sincerely,

A Proud Georgian

(A very silly guest post, from a very silly friend of mine who is struggling with the whole notion of potable reuse.)

14 comments:

Rosemary said...

That is laugh out loud funny.

Thank you.. great way to start a Monday!

Sayre said...

Only in California... and apparently Georgia!

Actually, potable reuse is alive and kicking everywhere. That's what "waste water management" is all about. They just don't say it out loud for fear of freaking out the citizenry. We've been drinking poop and pee for quite some time - except now it's apparently hip.

Not Hannah said...

Oof...too early in the morning to contemplate this. I think I'll pretend it was all a daydream brought about by a bad teabag. :)

(I prefer Bowel to Bowl--from my teabag-induced haze.)

Merrily Down the Stream said...

Funny - in a yucky kind of way
Poop to soup works for me
Here's a few more..
Out to In
Excrete and Ingest
There are a some of the same words that work too ie:
bowl to bowl
pot to pot
smile to smile(?)
(And you OTJ, stop by sometime...)

JoeinVegas said...

Here in Vegas all the outfall goes right into the lake, hopefully downstream from our water intakes, but it's just one big pond. So if you come here and stay in one of our fancy hotels, yes, it is.

Bungi said...

Shit! To think i will be visiting the US next month!! And i will be visiting CA, and i don't know what other places... Why didn't somebody warn me of this before?!!!

WILLIAM said...

I like

Urine-Ate

Postcard Mailing said...

I can't imagine, poop and pee in our drinking water? Uhm, next option please? The crap to crepe one's really good! Very catchy!

AprylsAntics said...

What about Doody to Beauty--or is that a better name for fertilizer?

John Ross said...

Gee, I think a lot of communities along our nation's rivers have been basically doing that to their down stream neighbors for, like, Ever. You know, Water treatment plant upstream from town, sewage treatment downstream. Then the next towon down river does the same thing.

Or are you talking about going straight from sewage treatment back into same water supply water supply?

Or worse yet....wait for it....bottled water factory! :-)

magnorth said...

Where ARE you these days??????? After years of pretty much constant posting through the toughest of kid years you've suddenly vanished! I MISS you....Just hope all well in your world and that nothing is rocking the boat. Prayer and good wishes from the other side of the world (Cape Town)

Color Printing said...

LOL.
If they're going to do this recycling water-thing, then they better just do it without telling the people. No one wants to know that their drinking water once came from the toilet. (Just kidding.)
Crap to crepe is "epic win."

picnic backpack said...

i like it

website affiliate programs said...

so funny,
bowl to bowl
pot to pot
smile to smile(?)