Friday, August 28, 2009

Ask For What You Need

My children were picking on each other at breakfast the other day.

[Because every day is the same.]

I interrupted them and asked WHY they fought so incessantly.

In response, they simply accused each other of being annoying.

[Oh, struggle of struggles!]

"Mayor, can you think of something The Rooster could do to make you feel good instead of annoyed?" I asked.

He thought for a moment.

"She could stop kissing and hugging me so much. I don't always like to be touched."

"And what about you, Rooster? Can you think of something The Mayor could do that would make you feel less annoyed?"

"He could help me to not feel so little all the time," she said.

[Mi pobrecita!]

A few days later they were both trying to make King Tut masks, an art project meant for much older kids.

There were a lot of pieces to cut out and The Rooster became increasingly frustrated.

"Here, let me help you," The Mayor said. "I'll cut your pieces out for you."

Beaming, she watched him cut. She didn't touch him at all.


WILLIAM said...

I like when I read about your kids arguing. It makes me feel better about my kids arguing and I have started referring to them as the short loud people.

Life As I Know It said...

Are you sure you aren't a trained mediator?

Mama Goose said...

I, too, love reading how you deal with these kinds of situations. It reminds me I'm not alone and my kids aren't the only ones who annoy the hell out of each other. But more importantly, you've really given me some wonderful ideas of what to do (besides yelling)to turn them around. Thanks.

megachick said...

i also have adopted the short and loud people phrase. this solution was brilliant. you're a buddha in training.

Not Hannah said...

Parenting score! You rock. T

Momish said...

Seems to me, your garden is beginning to blossom.

Kari said...

LOVE that story! It's like Parenting HR. ;-)

meno said...

This is why i only had one.


Woman with kids said...

Well done. That seems to have worked much better than my usual two methods: yell to LEAVE YOUR BROTHER ALONE FOR THE LOVE OF ALL CHEESE or ...hide until it goes away.

Marq | said...

Aww what a cute story! Good work on parenting! It's nice when they really got along, and it feels really great, knowing that you made them get along. Hats off to you!

StudentOfLife said...

A year or two ago my children wouldn't stop 'fighting'. Constant bickering and disagreeing, driving me bonkers. I finally made them sit down and write out 3 things that they liked about each other, 3 things they liked to do with the other, and 3 things they wished to change between them. They each read what the other wrote and they stopped fighting... so much. That was the best thing I ever did for them and I was proud of myself for coming up with it instead of losing my cool and screaming at the top of my lungs! Bravo to you, too!!

john smith / john smyth said...

i also have adopted the short and loud people phrase. this solution was brilliant. you're a buddha in training.

thisnewplace said...

i still don't understand it, one moment my girls are fighting to the death and the next, they are giggling in the corner. It's very personality-disorder-ish sometimes but gosh, am grateful when they turn the corner towards good.

moosh in indy. said...

Oooh, now THAT'S cute.